一辈子的遗憾

今天聊起富贵山庄 又想起了已过世的婆婆
为什么事隔多年 眼泪依然不禁夺眶而出
她是我这一辈子最爱的人
从小的相处 为我们的感情打下了坚稳的基础
她给予我的爱 是无限的 是无价的
她是多么的善良 随和
从不与人计较 从不吝于付出
她对我们无怨无悔的照顾
是我们一辈子没办法偿还的
偏偏 老天却带走了这一位好人
享年不过五十多岁 过身前还受癌症的折磨
为什么好人总没有多一点的福分?
虽然她不是我亲生婆婆
那又如何?她爱我们 不亚于爱她的亲生外孙
依稀记得 当我念幼儿园 妈妈只在周末带我回家
念完幼儿园 妈妈却要把我带回家
只在偶尔的周末带我探望婆婆公公
当时的我还小 却无法忘怀婆婆为此留下的眼泪
“树欲静而风不止,子欲养而亲不待“
那一位古人写出了如此贴切形容这样的情景的名句
我不清楚 但它却深深触动我的心
人嘛 总在失去后才更懂得珍惜
当时的我 还太小
没有能力带公公婆婆出去玩 甚至带他们吃吃东西
更没办法让他们好好享福
公公临终前仍在担忧父亲的事 我真的很难过
这些事 成了我这一辈子最大的遗憾
如果我可以有这么一次机会弥补
要我用再多的金钱换取我也愿意
也许我没有能力 但我一定会努力
可是 谁可以给我那么一次机会?...
我想你们 真的很想你们
这个遗憾 我没有办法弥补
只能永远的藏在心底
时隔多年 偶尔想起
还是会在我心中泛起一波波的涟漪
催下一串串的眼泪
我真得很想你们
如果你们看得见我得到的成绩
相信你们会很欣慰
至少我有那么一丁点能力让你们为我感到骄傲
如果你们可以看见我现在的他
相信你们会很高兴有人真心对待我那么的好
如果你们看得见我们现在的生活
相信你们会安心 至少我们过得不错
如果你们还在 我会天天陪你们谈心
就算再忙也会陪在你们身边
很后悔以前的我都不懂得表达自己的感受
如果你们还在 我会把对你们的爱
毫不保留的倾诉
现在除了小时候的照片
几乎没有和你们近期的合照
我留下了很多遗憾 很多我没有办法再履行的遗憾
如果你们还在 你们会是我最珍贵的宝物
很希望你们听得见 我很想你们...
你们过得好吗?你们还记得我吗?
你们到了世界的哪一方?...
我们来世 一定要再见 可以吗?
现在我唯一能做的 是好好的孝顺我的妈妈
把来不及给你们的爱 加付在妈妈的身上
绝对不再留下一丝遗憾...
对你们的爱 却永远不会减少
对你们的思念依旧如此深
我永远爱你们

Stupid me

EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
EMO
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE
CONFUSE

Ling Ling is exhausted...

Tua Ling Ling is extremely tired
I don't want test
I don't want assignment
but I fall in love with presentation =D
Sadness please get far away from me
I need
care I need warmth
I need space I need more time
I need freedom I need to relax
Stress please get far far away from me
I need concern I need attention
and
I need you

BArbeque & steamboat party for July Babies

Last Saturday had a birthday celebration for July babies
Ming Ming(730) , Ji Ji darling(709) and Kelvin Liew(730)
Desmond came from Selayang to fetch Ji and I

the journey to meet Ming & Cian at Ampang had consumed us 3-4 hours!
"amazing" right? xD
Thanks Desmond very much
He is the one who drive all the time without complaint =)
He is such a patient person
same as last time he fetched us back from Sunway
and we should thanks Ming's daddy
he had prepared all the thing for us =D
Maybe our planning was quite sucks
but at least we have an enjoyable time together
hope all of you have enjoy it alot
I'm down that I ate little that day xD

coz feel quite unwell and tired ( I'm not emo la chong)
took few photos nie as I mentioned that I'm tired

oh ya luckily Kelvin Liew manage to reach around 10 something
if not we gotta rub his name from the cake
and our effort will wasted =)

Lastly,thanks Ming them for cleaning up the mess <3>
for more details please refer to Wingkee's blog http://wingkeelee.blogspot.com/2009/07/birthday-batch-for-july-babies-d.html

Picture time <3 style="text-align: center;">grace n lingzz ^^

disgusting ==

Happy birthday to my dears !! =)

chong & lingzz

still smiling before suffer xD

wasabi wasabi wasabi ==

Punishment for the ppl who late =D

actually Eric is standing on the chair..shhhh xD

desmond so pity =(

see Eric's suffer face :X


Grace potential to become a host xD

Kelvin Liew =D

Happy birthday to Jiji darling,Ming and Kelvin
wish all your dreams come true =)
muackzz <3

当一切开始消逝......

昨天得知的事 开始扰乱我自以为已平静的心
我以为我的立场很坚定
殊不知 我只不过是在欺骗他人和自己
开始时还在怀疑事情的真假
可是那已经是不争的事实
我没办法掩饰 我真的很在意
原来装作若无其事 比我想象中还困难
我以为我可以表现得很自然
当真正面对 我还是无法忽视心的使唤
有了她 又如何?
和我有关系吗?没有 一点也没有
我不应该理会 也没有权力过问
可是该死的我却如此地在意
它不断地不断地侵蚀我的意念
无论睁着眼抑或闭者眼 它还是不断在脑海盘旋
够了!真的够了
难道没有办法让它消失吗?
至少我做不到
也许有些事情 不知道会比知道后来得好
这也许是最后一次了 真的最后一次了吧
我要的不多 却永远没办法得到
这也是最后一次放纵自己的发泄 真的
它让我心疲力竭 它让我累得让我不想再提起我的脚步
它让我的心多了一道伤口
时间可以愈合伤口 却无法磨灭那道深深的伤痕
有人说 受伤后在身体上留下的疤痕
是为了要让你记念你承受过的痛
也让你记住不再重犯让你受伤的错
那心上的伤痕呢?
我想 虽然肉眼无法看得见
当事人却能够深深地体会那椎心刺骨的痛楚
它也许会愈合 却没办法痊愈
哪天哪怕多年后 它被轻轻触碰 轻轻挑起
感受到的也许已不是痛楚 而是深渊般悲痛回亿
但 回忆总是美好的吗?
因为没有悲痛的回忆 你不会感受到今天的幸福
现在的我 已经累了
我没办法再为你心烦了
我的脚步 就在这里停止了
过去的 只不过是你从不在意的事
也是我不该在意的事
是我偏激了 是我想多了


* 她多好 她很好 这些我并不想要知道 *

我的他 我们的恋爱 最真实的剖白 I

虽然你无法看懂华文
可是我却觉得用华文更可以表达我的真实感受
我有多久没写华文了呢...
你有发现吗
和你在一起的时间是飞逝得那么快
已经一年七个月了
我却觉得和你的相遇就像是昨天才发生一样
每件事情都历历在目 我不曾忘了任何一个细节
与你经历的每件事都那么深刻 那么令我刻骨铭心
还记得吗 起初我们是那么的厌恶对方
甚至完全不交谈
曾几何时 我们开始被对方吸引
逐渐靠近 直到我答应了你
感动我的 是在我病倒期间 你从不间断的简讯
虽然我们的工作是不被允许在工作期间使用电话的
感动我的 是你那么担心即将开学的我 没有时间和你联络
虽然我们还没在一起
感动我的 是虽然我们才刚开始没多久 你就为我付出一切
给我最真诚的承诺 虽然我从来不给予承诺 因为我害怕
感动我的 是你不惜代价 为我完成一切 只要我安心
虽然我从来不懂得为你付出
感动我的 是你不断带给我的感动
在我最需要你的时候 往往你都会陪在我身边
在我最需要你的时候 往往你都会尽力做好 从不言累
还记得吗 我们第一次的约会 第一次牵手 第一次的拥抱 第一次的吻
很多的第一次 我不曾忘了
什么时候 我也懂得了付出 我也敢许下承诺
为爱的人付出 不是责任 不是做作 不是累赘 是最难得的幸福
也许很多时候得我很任性 很难懂 很极端 很负面
你却从来没有感到厌恶
你总是苦口婆心的劝导 耐心的关怀 温柔的呵护 无怨言的陪伴
我知道有时候我真的把你累坏了 你却从来没有怪我
有时候你的气话是那么伤人 我却依然那么爱你
偶尔你也会耍脾气 我很难过 跟你的冷战却从来没有超过一天 xD
真爱也许难寻 可是我却确定我是幸运的一个
也许你没有过人的智慧 没有亮丽的外形 没有丰厚的财产 也没有像小说里的主角贵族般的气质
加上我们的开始 也许是不被祝福的
那又怎样?你依然是我最爱的那个你
爱带给了我们过人的爱情 亮丽的心 丰厚的感情 贵族般的幸福生活
一切都从爱开始
你是我的生命的唯一
当发现我行差踏错 请把我拉回你的身边
因为只有你的怀抱 是我唯一可以放心栖息的地方
今生唯一的归宿
再没有人 可以像你那么爱我 那么包容我 那么了解我
我相信 我也是你的唯一 唯一你想呵护的我
就算世界一切都变了 只有你和我 永远都不会变
我们经历一切的波折 从来没有停止我们的脚步
我爱你 老公
* 为最爱的人 在左边心口保留位置 是最幸福的事 *

I really need some space for me to breath and some caring to warm me up

Finally today have submitted our IA assignment
It makes me missed QS lecture
grrr...how I gonna do my tutorials and do well in my exam?=(
I have promised that I will pay full attention on every lecture
attend every lecture,no more skip =D
Today thought can submit our assignment before 11am
but fate always playing us
In the end we submit our assignment on 2.30pm
If you saw 2 sopoh running to PA block
dont doubt on yourself, one of them was me xD
Luckily Wai Hoong can drive
if not how we gonna solve all the problems?sob
although we are in rush all the time
although there's some error
although fate is interupting us
although we have face many obtacles
although we done it last minute
BUT at least we did it nicely
I love our IA assignment
part of the reason is
all the invoices,credit notes,company's logo,cover were designed by me =D
don't praise me please,I will feel proud..xD
well,the stupid stationery shop have makes our files lost
we have lost the latest copy
what we have to do is re-correct all the errors and prepare our presentation asap!
what the..................=(

hmm thanks Wai Hoong,Siau Fang,Kar Yen and Phui Theng who have contributed in this
efforts from you are much appreciated =)

Just now went TS to have BBQ plaza with my dear and his family
It always be my favourite restaurant =D love it much
tomorrow are going to watch Ice age 3 with my dear dear~
looking forward it for so long
I can't wait to watch it since many ppl told me it is damn funny!!!!
and I want to finish all my tutorials during weekends!
so that I wont rush for it before the day I have tutorial
and have to start preparing for presentations,revisions
if have time have to update my old old posts =D
many thing many thing included this thing tat thing I have to do
arghh how come I so busy?
who can add me few more hours per day?=(
busy..busy..busy..since college started
who can understand my stress?I'm not smart as you think..

make thing so complicated

9th July 2009
11.00 am

In college CITC again
"repairing" our IA assignment
feel frustrated
we thought we almost finish up our assignment
but why now only found that there's many problem?
hard to check,its too ocmplicated
the beginning was simple
but why now things go complicated?
tomorrow will be the deadline for submitting the assignment
do we manage to do it?I don't know..let's see..

11.30 is going to have ME turtorial
today time table is too pack
i dont think we have enough time to finish it
phew..

Unexpected,feel vexed

something unexpect happened on Ling Ling Tua
I have dropped my phone into the college toilet bowl yesterday
dont ask me the process of grabbing it back
dont hope to recall at all =.=
during my M.economics lecture,i spend my time to remove all the diamond i stick on it
and rub the sticky dust with all my strength,finally it return to it's clean face =D
but in the afternoon,it commit suicide
memory card and sim card are succeccfully rescued
but my W580i have R.I.P
nyways,there's no any contact number in my sim card
now I know the reason
I have changed a new sim card because I shift to postpaid
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
so anyone who know bout this
PLEASE send me a msg so that I can get your contact number
or else,bye bye =D

yesterday night dear brought me to search for new phone
but the mobile phone's shops near my house have no stock for all the model
what the....
this morning there's no mobile phone for me to use
my previous motorola got some problem I think
so my dear lend me his iPhone =D
not bad to use
but i dont like touch screen,hard to type msg
basicly I prefer normal phone =D
somemore itsstress for me to use it
I really afraid that it will drop into toilet bowl
haih I'm really nervous everytime i enter toilet
I got "toilet bowl phobia" I think
just now my dear ask me to open my door
then I saw a box of thing at the floor
thanks dear
i didnt expect you will bought me a new phone that fast
I thought I will get it on sunday xD
he bought me a sony ericsson G705
thanks for deciding for me since I have no any idea for mobile phone
but I really miss my previous phone
I hate to change new phone T.T
although the 2 buttons of it spoilt but I still love it
changing new phone have to start everything from the beginning
I wan my previous phone T.T
and I dont hope to waste my dear's $$
$$ is not easy to earn
but no choice =(
nyways really thanks my dear
you will ready whatever I need at the right time
I love you so much <3
I'll appreciate everything you did for me
my only lao gong forever
dang dang my new phone
thanks bao beii




*friends , dont forget to inform me your contact number if u willing to
I don't have the strength to memorize all the contact number kay =D*